If NBA Players Played Rush Basketball…


Hey Guys,

It’s my favorite time of the year again: Welcome Week. While participating in activities mom and dad wouldn’t approve of and chasing girls are fun and all, I  absolutely love playing rush basketball. For those of you unfamiliar with Greek Life on college campuses, this glorious spectacle of basketball is an opportunity for freshmen to impress fraternity brothers in the hopes of salvaging a bid.

In a nutshell, it’s man flirting.  While spotting out atrocious play is not necessarily a rarity, there are occasions of basketball brilliance.  Every once in a while, some 18-year-old will show up and truly impress the brotherhood. In light of these uncommon, but exciting occurrences, I decided to put together a starting lineup of NBA players who would dominate out in the fraternity parking lot.

And most importantly, do it with grit and style.



C JaVale McGee–  Perhaps the most athletic big in the league, McGee would absolutely own the backyard.  The combination of his 7”4 wingspan and freakish hops would make it nearly impossible for opponents to score inside.  On the offensive side of the ball, he wouldn’t even need to jump to slam it home.  Coupled with the fact that the games are half-court, you cut out his ugliest flaw: lack of common sense.


F Blake Griffin– This one’s more or less a no-brainer.  While basketball gurus would tell you that the former 1st overall selection of the 2009 draft has his shortcomings, athleticism is not one of them.  Paired with the PG coming up later in the article, there would be no shortage of Lob City on any college campus.


F LeBron James– How could I not include the best player on the face of the planet?  As much as people hate him, he really has no flaws in his game. On any given play, he could something that would have you shaking your head in awe.  His speed, strength and touch make him virtually unguardable.  He’d wreck the competition out back and probably have no problem winning 28 games in a row again.


G Derrick Rose– I’m going to play small and take my chances with Derrick as my two.  Because wind is a factor outside, it’s important that a guard doesn’t live and die on the perimeter.  If you’ve ever watched Rose play, explosion is an understatement.  More like lightening-bolted tiger. When healthy, the guy might be the smoothest, most explosive backcourt player in the game.  Also, my editors wouldn’t let me leave him off. (Editor’s note: TRUUUUUUU)


G Chris Paul– I was about to put Steve Nash on this list and then I remembered it wasn’t 2006.  While Nash in his prime would have been a great choice, Paul is in a league of his own at the point guard position in 2013.  For the backyard game, he’s got it all: athleticism, a jump shot, vision and quick hands to swipe the ball away.  In a game to 11 (ones and twos, of course.), I’d say he’s responsible for eight points.

Notable Bench Players

G Nate Robinson– A generous 5”9, Robinson would be the perfect reserve for any street-ball affair.  He’s cocky, plays his heart out and loves to chirp.  What more can you ask of a street-ball player?  When Nate comes in the game, something exciting is bound to happen.

G Jimmer Fredette– While I doubt this Mormon will be joining a fraternity any time soon, this guy’s on the squad for one reason- knock down trey balls.  With the importance of the long-ball in rush basketball, it’s critical to have a perimeter threat.  When Jimmer gets ample playing time and the green light, he can flat out dazzle you with his range.  If it’s windy outside, Fredette’s not seeing the light of day.

F Reggie Evans– He’s the garbage collector of the team.  Whether it’s setting a hard screen or muscling up a weaker, interior player, Reggie will do the dirty work.  Numerous times, Evans will post a four point-15 rebound performance.  Off the bench, you can’t ask for anything else.

While the lineup is certainly for debate, I hope that you understood my rationale for my selections and would love to hear your thoughts on Facebook, Twitter, or Reddit. It’s time to  lace ’em up and go to the house.

Have a good one,



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